Bomie Tikwayo

Her name simply means “full of life” and that,she is. She is genuinely unlike anyone you’ve ever met. The first time I laid my eyes on her, I knew she was different, she looked different, MY kind of different, almost nerdy… she was exactly my “cup of tea”. Not long after that, we found ourselves waiting at some Total Filling station for a minibus to Ngqamakhwe, we were both attending a funeral. We had never been properly introduced before, and the first thing she cheerfully said to me was “hi ntombi, my name is Bomikazi Tikwayo, you can call me Bomie!” Next thing we were chatting like we’d long known each other, going to the “under the garden bathroom” together, having a picnic together, attending camps together, you name it. My absolute adoration for Bomie comes from the fact that she is a simple girl, a lady at heart, completely down to earth, her lifestyle is vastly different from what most are used to but she never imposes her beliefs on anyone nor makes anyone feel uncomfortable for having different beliefs. Bomie has a passion for life, education and children amongst other many things, here’s more of her…

1. Who are you and what do you think your purpose on earth is?

I am a hard nut to crack, bubbly, warm, inviting, lovely, lovable and a loving people’s person. My purpose on earth is to help children know that they matter and can be the best that they can be. Training, moulding and fashioning children into the best version that reflects a lovely character is to be done in loving kindness with all tenderness and care so that they do not resent their childhood or even the one entrusted to do such divine work.

2. Please tell us about your journey and how you've reached the point where you are now, spiritually, mentally, physically etc.

Reaching where I am now is more than all else fuelled by knowing that God has been and always will be with me, also, knowing that I’m the only one who can fulfil my life’s purpose in the way that God has implanted in my heart.

3. What kind of legacy would you like to leave on earth?

I believe it will all be reproduced by the children I come into contact with more frequently and get to spend time with, moreover my son for he only gets the best and worst of me for there is no pretending or fakeness he gets to encounter with me.

4. What gives you the motivation to keep going on a daily basis?

The belief that I am not yet where I am ought to be and having accepted that grinding is to continue as long as there is still breath in me, knowing that God has got my and my son’s backs, and looking forward to the blessed hope of Christ’s soon appearing.

5. How would you advise your 13 year old self?

Keep enjoying each moment as life unfolds it to you, and keep embracing diversity.

6. With the rise of Gender Based Violence in our country, and being a mom to a boy child, what will you teach your son about the value of women?

I think this is mostly instilled through values and morals. What I mean is that; if a child understands that my “NO” wavers not and is consistent where applicable, then he’ll find it easy not to only respect “NO” from women but also his other associates as he grows. And one thing I have just learnt recently from my 2 year old son is that he needs his “NO” to be respected too. At times when he is doing bathroom business, he either hides in the closet or shuts himself in a room with no one so that he can do his business freely though he is still on diapers, I allow him because I think giving him that respect also teaches him that people need to be given room to be themselves.

7. What do you understand about education?

I think education has not only to do with mental development, but also social, spiritual and physical aspects of a human being and that is to be harmonious.

8. What are your talents and how are you using them to positively impact the next person?

I am not sure if my passion and love for kids is a talent, but it does not even bother me one bit to meet a child’s need and minister to it with all care and due kindness and love. I also find it easy to serve, listen without imposing my ideas and opinions and making people feel good about who they are is one thing I do easily.

9. What would you like to achieve before you die/ before Jesus comes back?

Before all is over for me, I would be more content and see myself as have done it all if I get to be in the media, be it television/ have a kiddies show on t.v or radio, write and publish a book, own and run my ideal school, continue seeing my son grow into the man that he is meant to be on a daily basis and lastly get married to the man that’ll love me like he has never loved before and continue choosing to love, cherish and make me feel like I’m the only woman in his world.

10. What's on your fun bucket list?

Travel, learn to swim, dance in the rain in my birthday suit, karaoke club, listen to country music without disturbance, go on a cruise, have a ladies only night, camp outdoors, go for a spa treatment, attend an award ceremony, meet my favourite celebrities in person. (Let me end here there is more)

11. If a girl child would shadow you for a week, what would you make sure to teach them?

Self-denial, self-control and doing whatever am doing to the best of my ability and in a manner that leaves a smile on the other person.

12. What is your opinion on societal standards towards women concerning such topics as marriage, child bearing and leadership?

I think we need a break, the pressure is too much when it comes to conforming to norms and acceptable standards. Women can take feminine leadership roles and do very well, then there are some roles wherein I feel like no matter how much women try or do they can never ever do them in a way that men do them. God created us differently for a reason and a purpose therefore we need not try so hard to be like men but rather learn how to be more feminine in this distorted world so that we are not as though we're competing with men but rather embracing our femininity. When it comes to marriage we need to accept that not all women are meant to have a spouse and or bear children. We are not to box people into what we believe is ideal in our own understanding but rather learn to live with that which is different for different is good.

13. What is your understanding of the phrase "the future is female"?

The majority of women will run the world.

14. What is the greatest lesson that you’ve learnt about life in general?

Life is an interesting discovery, you have to continue equipping, educating and just informing yourself for there is something new to learn as life itself is a textbook filled with wonders, possibilities and so much more.

15. What do you appreciate the most about yourself?

My smile, my figure, my long legs, my being ageless and my tone.

16. What does self-love mean to you?

As someone once easily put it, “it begins with you“, also one of my favourite phenomenal women, Lisa Nichols adds on by saying, “you cannot pour from an empty cup”. Fill yourself up first and overflow so that you do not run on dry. Christ is a perfect example for He is quoted as someone who spent moments in solitude communing with God so that He is girded with strength for the daily tasks. It’s said that in the early hours of the morning after all His daily tasks were done and dusted He gave Himself some “me time” or selflove.

17. What are you most curious about?

Nature, love, relationships, children, how the body works as well as Christianity and all that has to do with God.

18. What kind of books do you read and what is the one book or two that have changed your life?

I’m more on spiritual, love and relationships most of the time but I am someone who is an all-rounder and give myself challenges so if I want to learn more about health then I’ll give myself a month or two on a particular subject while still on my core topics. The Bible, Steps to Christ and Desire of Ages are my favourite books. Except for the bible, these books were written by Ellen G White. Other than these 3 books, as long as it’s non-fiction I do give it a try.

19. What do you think you should be doing more of?

Exercising more, eating more healthy, playing more, going out more and sleeping more.

20. Who/ what has been your greatest inspiration?

I am one of the people who grew up wanting to be totally different from what I saw most frequently because it just didn't  seem to serve me well, because of that, I have not one person or thing to single out. 

21. What would you say to all the women and young girls across the world?

Take time to know and understand yourself, trust not easily but rather give people time to show their true self first, your mistakes are learning curves, do not beat yourself up because of them. Seek not validation from any other source but God and let Him be your confidant, true best friend and reason for all. Finally the still small voice/whispering of the holy Spirit is always the voice that should speak volumes, don't only listen to it but do according to its biddings.

THE END.